I'm the boy that looks excited
I'm the boy that's gonna fall apart
Candyfloss, I lie to myself
I'm the boy that eats his heart out

I know I should be more careful
I know I should watch where I've been
Candyfloss and she's a safecracker
She kissed me first and then broke in

We slip and slide on the stay-together landmine
I make my mind up to never be myself
And every time I make a rhyme
I live my life for someone else

Oh-whoa-whoa
Oh-whoa-whoa
Oh-whoa-whoa

She's in the kitchen with bitter diamond drunks
(She's in the way)
I'm on the sofa hoping she leaves that punk cause
(I'm in the way)

I'm the boy with the poetry power
I'm the boy, smells like flowers
Every time I make a rhyme
I live my life like I wasn't invited

Oh-whoa-whoa

She's in the way
I'm in the way

I'm the boy that looks excited
I'm the boy that's gonna fall apart
Candyfloss, she kissed me first
And I'm the boy, don't get me started

I know I should be more careful
I know I should watch where I've been
Candyfloss, she's a safecracker
She kissed me first, then broke in

Oh-whoa-whoa

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Farewell message:
In loving memory of my secondary school days, this piece of me will remain in the depths of the virtual world, for as long as time. I'll not be deleting it and if you happened to pass by here in the future, be assured that my presence is felt, and that i was here, a long time ago, writing and filling in every detail of my life.

I've moved on to heaven.

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FUN-O-RAMA had a crazy start and a crazy ending.
Everywhere you went in ACJC, people were talking, shouting and screaming non-stop, it was this buzz of activity that ran on and on and on. At some points of time, you couldn't even really hear your own voice.
Simple your many gestures may be, i'm touched by all of them, because these little things are the ones that show you more than care.
It was my first time being involved in such a large-scale carnival. I must admit, it was impressive. The originality and creativity of all the different stalls was just eye-ogling and mind-boggling. I couldn't imagine anything of such sort in my creative-brain-juices-filled brain. There were banners of all sorts which were also done up nicely with paint. The school looked...fit for a funfair. For a funfair done up by a school, it was of the same standard done up by professionals.
I feel sad when everytime you go all the way out to do something for me, there's nothing for you in return.
They even managed to obtain sponsorship(eg.NTUC) and all sorts of things, literally were sold there. Things like, TOOTHPASTE and even a $100 'branded' cake were sold out.
No favours, just..Nothing.
Shift was the first slot.
People came and went. Small little children aiming ping pong balls into our 'smelly shoes' that dangled from the top. It WAS kind of funny because our grand prize was a TV phone which was a HUGE scam, because we made others think we had a iphone to give out. Instead, it was just this lousy made-in-china imitation of an iphone, where by a thought-to-be stylus pen was a radio antenna, which was incidentally pulled out by Simeon.
I'm not able to give you what you want, not now. That's why, i'm pleading for you to stop this selfless giving.
We were laughing like crazy when the antenna popped out.
We couldn't help it, you know.
It was just SUPER funny.
It's killing me inside, bit by bit, little by little. I shouldn't have lied to myself. That my talking to you, was not going to affect you in any way. Was not going to hurt you in any way possible.
Bakas and Ben10 came too.
We had a happy time chit-chatting and laughing at a certain someone because his coupons kept getting koped away by us and when his $4 helium balloon flew away.
HAHAHAHA. Okay, sorry adriel. Have to thank you anyway la. For the sponsorship of coupons. Orelse, i wouldn't have gotten my beautiful, precious cotton-candy.
Fish. That was never going to come true. I shouldn't have given myself that little happiness i found in talking to you, because thattt, would, in fact, hurt you more. I should not have allowed myself such a luxury, at your expense.
Conclusion of the day was the tiredness of it all. It didn't looked THAT tiring to me, but, ultimately, after everything, my legs were going jelly-like and soft.
Would you have given me your all if i told you the line that you feared? Would you have continued being selfless? i wanted 'yes's, but it was impossible.
The setting-up of the stall, was as claimed by other classes, slacked for us, cause we only had one stall to focus on. HOWEVER, DO NOT, by all means, assume, that our job is less tiring than you guys. We went through hell deciding the banner, the back-drop and the placing of the tables, gifts and choosing the tablecloth. IT WAS JUST SHIT WORK.
if you said yes, i would've probably blamed myself for being greedy, for ignoring how you felt. Giving little care to your feelings. Loving someone with all your heart is not easy.
1AA2 were also delightfully camwhoring after all the clearing-up. We were waiting for the in-charge to take his own sweet time to come over to our stall and check out the clearing that we did. It was damn funny, because Cleo's balloon flew away after undergoing 'beating' by us. we were trying to slam the balloon into each other's faces and the rebounding of the balloon against our palm was just too much for the cord that it broke, and off it went.
Somehow, i wanted you to stay beside me, even though i knew i couldn't give you anything back. I thought hard. Why?? Was i really selfish? Hoping you wouldn't leave me? Hoping you would stay by my side, forever tied.
The balloon came off and it was released to freedom.
i didn't know why i did it. Its probably the reason why i'm so confused. i want you, and i want you not.
Thereafter, we continued, merrily, with the fooling around and the koping of free jellies that we shamelessly took.
I feel tight inside everytime i think of you. A flitting image makes me shrink inside. A clog in my heart, lumping together, so tight. i can't breathe.
Things i earned from fun-o-rama:
1. A hot-pink and black piggy beanbag plushie
2. Heart-shaped white earrings
3. 2 love-shaped lollipops
4. A panda bear with a red 'LOVE' t-shirt
5. Candyfloss!
6. Aching legs
7. Blue flower cushion with smiley face (minus this, cause i gave it to kuaiwen, who was eyeing it for a very very very long time.)
8. Smiley face badge
9. Haunted house ticket as souvenir
Why am i such a loser?! i go around breaking people's hearts. And then i feel sorry for doing so.
That reminds me, Scone's haunted house was hilarious. Although they made a deliberate effort in realism, with the ghosts and the atmosphere, it was just LAUGHING AND ROLLING OVER FLOOR LAUGHING SOMEMORE.
My soft-heartedness is idiotic. It is not an excuse for my actions. It is the reason why i always can't bring myself to bear the truth on you. Instead, i try to work it out on my own. I should not have been so indecisive. Brings about grief, and more grief. Heartache, and more ache. But now, i know, clearly, how you feel.
Beonnan was damn funny because halfway through, he received a call from his classmate, and then he went 'Go away la, ghost.' when an apparent ghost swooped over his head. He also continued with the epic 'i'm in a haunted house.' I bet his friend on the other line would be wondering what the hell he was talking about. LOL.
I'm inflicting pain on someone dear i care for. Maybe i'm a plaque, something that shouldn't exist, should never, ever, have been born into this world.
Another owned part was the fact that kangwei went to AH's haunted house and one of the ghost's phone suddenly rang and he picked it up saying 'i'm in the haunted house scaring people. KAY. BYE.'
During the haunted house, i was also happily koping lightsticks. Laughed till my tears came out, really.
I think the 'ghosts' there were also trying their very best not to laugh at us. Our laughter was like, ringing throughout the entire LT2 and they were probably thinking we were insane. I was holding onto my stomach because it hurt too much after laughing all the way and i almost forgot to breathe.
Guilt. And everything else, that makes me feel sick. Because you should be mugging. Your studies are more important than THATstupid girl. A distraction that should be discarded.
Okay, enough of all the insanity.
I edited my skin, very obvious, yeh.
Included the theme of CANDYFLOSS! WHOO.
I finally managed to take a picture with my all time favourite food.
LOVEIT.
Changed my profile a little too.
i'm loving it.








The rest of the pictures were taking so long to upload that i gave up.
Haha. I'll try to upload them on facebook when i have time.
Now, its time for homework.

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I wonder how many times you want to keep me in suspense.

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i'm going to smile and act my cheery self tomorrow even though i feel lousy.

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A PENCIL MAKER TOLD THE PENCIL 5 IMPORTANT LESSONS:

1) EVERYTHING YOU DO WILL ALWAYS LEAVE A MARK.

2) YOU CAN ALWAYS CORRECT THE MISTAKES YOU MAKE.

3) WHAT IS IMPORTANT IS WHAT IS INSIDE OF YOU.

4) IN LIFE , YOU WILL UNDERGO PAINFUL SHARPENING WHICH WILL MAKE YOU A BETTER PERSON.

5) TO BE THE BEST PENCIL, YOU MUST ALLOW YOURSELF TO BE HELD AND GUIDED BY THE HAND THAT HOLDS YOU.

Life laughs at you when you are unhappy..
Life smiles at you when you are happy....
Life salutes you when you make others happy!

Be a good pencil!

Yes, it was another chain mail sent by my dad. His emails are always soooo interesting. *wonders where he gets them from*
Anyway, that was just something to lighten up your day.
If you happen to see this, they were probably not meant for your eyes.

Hope i'm able to finish my homework today. *Cries* I've been trying realllll hard to complete everything, but its impossible.

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Realised my blog's starting to stale, so i popped by!

Been VERY VERY VERY busy lately.
The march holidays are really, just a frantic, homework rush in disguise. There's practically no time for anything relaxing, least of all, let me say the precious word, sleep.

I guess my eyebags are enlarging in no time and the dark rings around my eyes will deepen into black, panda circles. And then, i'll look like some fugly, old bitch, deprived of sleep.

Screw the homework.

I'm sort of regretting my choice for taking h2 art. No, actually, there's no room for regret. I just HAVE to keep going. Its this ultimate love-hate relationship with art, according to Zoe, that's soooo infuriating.

On one hand, you love it so much, you think you'll give it your all.
On the other, you dislike it because there's nooo time to do anything else and its seeping away your everything. Heart, mind, body and soul.

Currently still drawing still life and objects. The spiders have already taken form and colour, and i'm starting on the water lilies..things are still crawling and my progress is at snail pace. I'm starting to wonder if i ever could, finish it on time. Sova's half-done (no, its one quarter) and the rest of the subjects are untouched. Good game, girl. Triple g.

I'm also filled with dread that i went for lifeguards camp. I should have pon-ed my way through. But then again, i would miss out on a whole lot of fun. There wasn't much bonding actually cause everyone was well, already bonded, before the camp. Even the jc2s who came were so fewwww. I guessed it just brought us together. Closer, maybe. We'll definitely miss each other..Especially the j2s i guess, when they leave us at the end of the year. D:

HOMEWORK. HOMEWORK. HOMEWORK.

AHHS, its just too overwhelming i can't even forget about it.
Remember the days when you could even FORGET homework..

There're three words that can never be left out in a confession, especially when you want a reaction.

Maybe you didn't know the importance of just 3 simple words.

That they were never said,
not once.

Maybe if you said them, things would be different.
I could give you a different answer.

You left me to self-assume...
I can't just believe in something that isn't there.

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Shit.
I'm so pissed.
I'm perfectly calm when i talk to some other people so don't tell me i'm on PMS.

Because a certain someone doesn't even know what it means to start loving himself. I feel sorry for you.

Love yourself,
Love me not.
If you can't even do that, how are you going to love someone else?

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These designs were done by me using photoshop yesterday. They are supposedly, for, ACJC's lifeguard team's teeshirts/banner/jacket. (i guess). I had a hell of a time trying to make them look as interesting and fun as possible, but it was worthwhile.

Many people prefer the first one, as well as lifeguard6,7,10 and 11.
I rly put in a lot of effort into this and it feels good that people like the designs. (:

LIFEGUARD1

LIFEGUARD2

LIFEGUARD3

LIFEGUARD4

LIFEGUARD5

LIFEGUARD6

LIFEGUARD7

LIFEGUARD8

LIFEGUARD9

LIFEGUARD10

LIFEGUARD11



i can't believe i was so dense.

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5 objects that describe me.

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I feel like a stick.

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HAPPY BIRTHDAY, Daddy.
Thank you for chidding and prohibiting me to do almost everything. I know very well, now, that your over-protectiveness usually spans from being overly concerned. I just want to say that, without your presence, i'd feel lost. Very lost. Because I'm used to having you around and i can't imagine life without you. Thank you for your guidance these sixteen years of my very existence. You're my guiding light and even though i know i'll never ever say these three words out loud, i love you.
Aside from sentiments, i'm here with official news.
NEWS OF THE DAY: I've started dating andddd I've also found a new BFF. (In case you don't know, BFF stands for Best-Friend-Forever.)
My dearest bunk bed is my boyfriend and google has became my bestfriend of the year. (And following years to come.)

I love my bed, totally.
I would give my life, heart and soul in exchange to be with it for a minute.
Just one minute.
Just that minute more would do.
I would also gladly spend my last few dying moments lying on it.

I'm lacking in sleep and this sleep deprivation process is killing me.
Its probably due to all the draining physical training that lasts throughout the entire week. The dreaded process is also a non-stop, continuous cycle that repeats itself, every single day.

You might be thinking that i'm a complain queen or what have you, but i don't give a shit man. I'm rly damn tired and the only way to release my pent-up desperation for sleep is to allow myself to bemoan, fuss, grumble, protest, whine, yak, and bitch non-stop about how tired i am until its to my satisfaction.

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Mood: Contemplative
I'm feeling so hyper happy because i'm relieved.

I found my pencil case.
*Jumps all over the place in esctacy*.

But, then again, i realised something.
I'm dumb.

Ya, you're right.
I REALISED i'm dumb.
I might just BE the dumbest person in the whole wide world, right now.

FYI: I did not knock my head against the table, neither did i bang it against the wall.

Guess where i found my pencil case?
It had dropped into the hole beside my table and the wall.
AND I DIDN'T NOTICE.

Come to think of it, if i remembered correctly, i did hear a resounding crash, and i DID remember thinking 'Shit, my pencil case dropped. Ahhhh. I'll pick it up later.'
AND THENNNN, forgetting to pick it up LATER.
Retardedly, the 'later' part never did OCCUR to me later on.

WORSE OF ALL, i stupidly thought i lost my pencil case.
I even THOUGHT i left my pencil case at the pool deck.
I even bothered two lifeguard seniors by asking them if they did see my pencil case and making them send smses to the j1s and coach just to look for it.

THE WORSEWORSEWORSEWORSEWORSE OF ALL, i thought it was hopeless after personally making a trip to the pool deck area, the pool office(still got niao-ed by some asshole in-charge, i don't know who, in the pool. Who cares if you lost your pen or pencil.), the shower room, the gym, the gym office. the lost-and-found in the general office and triple-checking with friends if they did see it, THATTTTT I WENT TO BUY NEW STATIONARY.

Call that pro.
I wasted my TIME, anddd, MY money.

OMFGOD.
HOW MOREEEEE STUPID CAN I BEEEE?
..

Mental note to self:
MY DEAR MS LIYING.
This is really unforgivable.

You...
YOU owned.
You're just PLAIN DUMB.
DUMB. DUMB. DUMB. DUMB. DUMB.
DUMB.
When did you become such a pig-brainer and WHERE THE HELL did such stm-ness and baichi-ness come from???

Is this even youuu?!
Now you've to apologise to the entire world because you THOUGHT you lost your pencil case when in actual fact, you FORGOT to pick it up.
How more freaking stupid can you get?! HUH?!

How can someone even be so helldamn stupid?
Your stupidity continuously inconvenience others and ALL for your stupid sake.
Stop being so ultra stupid.

Actually, I didn't exactly find it.
My dad was the hero of the day.

How joke..i can't help but laugh at myself.

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Something for your entertainment.
If you don't find it entertaining, that's because you're not trying hard enough, to be amused.

Instructions: Look at the pictures and try to see what is in there. If you still can't see, relaxxxxzxc. If it doesn't work again, breathe in and out before trying it another time. If it fails, YET again, forget it. You ain't going to get it anyway.

LET YOUR IMAGINATION RUN FREE!

Can you see the three women?


Watch closely. Can you tell the difference between a horse and a frog?
This includes tilting your head sideways.


This is just beautiful.
Can you see the kissing couple?
I couldn't see at first...that's because i wasn't horny enough and i looked, ONLY, at the big picture, which was, obviously, the ROSE, within a frame.


Can you see the baby?


There's a face in here. Can you see it?


Can you see 10 faces in the tree?


If you succeeded in all of the above, congratulations, you're on your way to becoming the world's next, future artist.

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Currently listening to: Glitter in the air by Pink.

Have you ever fed a lover with just your hands?
Close your eyes and trust it, just trust it
Have you ever thrown a fist full of glitter in the air?
Have you ever looked fear in the face
And said I just don't care?

It's only half past the point of no return
The tip of the iceberg, the sun before the burn
The thunder before lightning,
the breath before the phrase.
Have you ever felt this way?

Have you ever hated yourself for staring at the phone?
Your whole life waiting on the ring to prove you're not alone.
Have you ever been touched so gently you had to cry?
Have you ever invited a stranger to come inside?

It's only half past the point of oblivion.
The hourglass on the table,
the walk before the run.

The breath before the kiss and the fear before the flames
Have you ever felt this way?

La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la

There you are, sitting in the garden
Clutching my coffee, calling me sugar
You called me sugar
Have you ever wished for an endless night?
Lassoed the moon and the stars
and pulled that rope tight.

Have you ever held your breath and asked yourself
Will it ever get better than tonight? Tonight.

I have the tendency to overblog during weekends. Maybe i'm just trying to repay the lost time at blogging. It's getting sweltering hot these days ey.

My class is addicted to camwhoring. Seems like everyone in 1AA2 looooves taking pictures.




<3<3<3<3<3<3
We're One AA2, yo.